The Stereotyped Men.

“Don’t cry like a girl”
“Be a man, carry the weight”
“Earn more, you’re the breadwinner of the family”
“Don’t play with dolls, you’re a boy, play with cars”
“Pink makes you look feminine, don’t wear it”
“Be strong, men don’t cry”

These are just a few of many sentences that men get to hear from their childhood. They are told about their roles from the beginning. When children start growing, their parents automatically start defining their roles and interests according to their gender which ultimately develops in their personality. This is how most of the households mould their children since birth. From “boys play with cars” to “men don’t cry” gender stereotypes are reinforced by society.

When a kid hurts himself and starts crying, people tell him to stop crying like a girl as if girls are born with the trait of crying and boys are insensitive to pain. When a boy plays with dolls, parents try to incline his interest in cars and superheroes. According to the society, an ideal man is the one who is strong, arrogant and little oppressive too.

Real men do cry.

It is found in a study that depressed men are four times more likely to commit suicide than women. One of the underlying reasons for this is that men never completely express their thoughts and feelings. The society does not let a man express himself. He is expected to keep his emotions to himself. He isn’t supposed to cry because he’s a MAN and according to people men don’t cry. Crying is not deemed to be his trait as crying is a symbol of weakness and men shouldn’t be weak. This stereotype makes it difficult for men to express their feelings. They are mocked and made fun of when they cry. They are told to stop crying, puck up and be a man.

People expect a man to get settled and get married before the age of 30. I don’t think there’s an age limit to decide anything. Everything happens at the right time. Getting settled at the age of 35 is okay and finding love at the age of 40 is also okay. If a guy wants to get married at the age of 25, that’s okay too.

To every man out there- it’s completely okay to cry and express yourself, don’t make yourself suffer in silence to please the people of this society. Don’t be harsh on yourself. It’s okay to feel hurt and cry your heart out. You’re not always supposed to be strong and arrogant. Nothing is as important as your feelings. It’s okay to be sensitive, wear pink, cry, follow your passion and be yourself. No one can decide how you feel and express your feelings. You deserve to let out your emotions and you deserve self-love.

Published by Shivani Gupta

Feeling. Writing. Healing.🌸❤

62 thoughts on “The Stereotyped Men.

  1. We live in a society organized from a gender classification where stereotypes are considered natural. Biological differences that are assumed to be normal and that are not contrasted. Stereotypes change continuously, so it is more important to dispense with classifications or categories and for a child to do what makes her happy according to her character and not according to gender. Therefore, focusing the activities according to your preferences will avoid confusions or establish erroneous guidelines.
    I find your article very interesting. A clarification to take into account.

    Liked by 5 people

  2. All polarization factor well started actually in our family to follow folkways/norms.. This is enough. We should break this societal structure gradually.
    Pl go through my latest post regarding this.
    Adopting SOA strategy.
    Your feedback in any extent is welcome to develop my blogging.

    Liked by 4 people

  3. What you have written is very much appreciated, because there is a general feeling or confusion regarding what a man should do, or be, in today’s world.

    I still remember the time when I said to my wife at least 25 years ago – no more white business shirts for me – coloured shirts are the go. She was so excited. Of course it’s quite common now. Then, during my second appointment as CEO, I began wearing (and still do) Hawaiian and bamboo shirts on a Friday. Many staff have taken this on board and found it liberating.

    I was married at 24. My wife was 20. She is the most amazing person, and even more so to this very day. We have always worked as a team.

    Yes, it’s so important for men to talk. In fact men do talk, it’s just, perhaps they don’t talk about the things they should, such as their mental health. So, I have over the years worked in many places where I have promoted specialist men’s health sessions, activities and events (e.g. cricket matches that have men’s health as a focus).

    When a man has tears in his eyes – it’s time to listen and not judge 😊

    Liked by 7 people

  4. The concept of man, as society means it, that is, strong, confident, who does not get caught up in emotions, is a pretty wrong concept that has caused a lot of damage to more sensitive people and that continues to hurt many.

    Liked by 4 people

  5. Ojala hubiera más jovencitas como Ud. con las ideas bien claras sobre los sentimientos porque los sentimientos no deben esconderse por falsas ideas machistas que mucho daño nos ha hecho a la sociedad.

    Liked by 3 people

  6. Amazing topic selection, this is a bitter truth of society wherein ridiculous protocols has been created for bieng men & women by society. A man can cry too because he do have feelings and emotions and to keep them out will never make him coward. Keeping things inside causing depression & making life hard, and to change this we need a serious change in society.
    Keep writing!

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Shivani, this is a wonderful post. Things are getting better, but we still have a way to go!

    I remember at the age of eight seeing my father cry. I don’t know why he cried, but I remember how bewildered I felt because I had never seen him cry before. I never saw him cry again, and he lived to be seventy-five.

    My two husbands cried on rare occasions. To me, it showed their humanity. My significant other cries frequently. I respect that. It is normal to have emotions, and healthy to express them.

    I think women are much more liberated now than in the past. Men deserve liberation from gender roles, too. It is time to encourage everyone to fulfill their full potential as human beings and stop trying to limit them with stereotypes.

    Bravo to you Shivani, for doing your part! All the Best! Cheryl

    Liked by 1 person

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